After many hours of deliberations, the winning story was deemed to be from, Carl Smith of www.travelmonkee.co.nz.
"The judges were impressed with Carl's graphic detail of the horrors that ensued while hosting a high-maintenance "family from Hell" at his motel in Taupo."
The yarn will be appreciated by moteliers that are experiencing an influx of leisure guests at this time of the year. While most guests will be easily satisfied, others will be habitual "bell ringers" that seem to struggle with simple tasks when away from a familiar environment;-)
Here's the winning story:
So a little time ago, I received a booking for a family of 3, no they didn’t want the family apartment, they would take the studio with the pull out sofa, cheaper and they would only be here for one night so that was okay.
So at about 6.30 pm the family of 4 arrived, right at dinner, (but that what happens in a motel, always at dinner, or when you are on the bog etc)
Conversation
Them: We are here to check into the family apartment.
Me: Arrr you booked the studio with the fold out sofa for the three of you, except I see there are four!
Them: Well can you give us the apartment at the same price as the studio, since we forgot to mention our other son.
Me: No sorry for one the apartment is booked, and secondly it would cost you an extra $60.
Them: Okay, (sighing) we will be forced to take the studio, even though you should have put us for no extra charge in the apartment.
Me: (Trying hard to ignore them) okay let’s get you checked in.
So I took them up to the room, showed them how to fold out the sofa, put in extra blanket as requested, (as they were from a warmer climate and it is so cold here).
Sit down to resume dinner, the phone rings.
Them: This is room 21 there is no remote for the TV.
Me: Okay I will come up.
I enter the room and the TV is playing, the 3 year old is watching TV with the remote in her hand.
Me: Your daughter has the remote.
Them: Don’t be silly...Oh did you just give it to her?
Me: No, (smiling condescendingly because by this time I had their number sussed).
Them: Ok we will call you if we have any other problems.
Me: Oh I’m sure you will be fine, really!
Sit down with fork in hand, phone rings.
Me: hello room 21.
Them: yes the doors in the toilet do not shut.
Me: Oh, I will come up.
In the hall way I noticed a pungent smell coming from under the door of room 21, upon opening the door, I notice the microwave has smoke pouring out of it. I look around the room, they are all watching TV, (with the found remote).
Me: Did you noticed the microwave, I say as they look at me. By this time I have the remainder of microwave popcorn smoldering and burning on the tray, and place it out the door.
Them: What is wrong with this product, it says microwave for up to 5 minutes.
Me: or until it stops popping, most occasions in under 3 minutes.
Them, Silly microwave, you should have it looked at.
Me, examining the Microwave: Ah I think you have burnt the wall of the oven, (and stunk out the room and upper floor).
Them: Never mind, you should fix these broken doors, (these are sliding doors that open the bath tub into the room, most people know how to work sliding doors).
So at about 6.30 pm the family of 4 arrived, right at dinner, (but that what happens in a motel, always at dinner, or when you are on the bog etc)
Conversation
Them: We are here to check into the family apartment.
Me: Arrr you booked the studio with the fold out sofa for the three of you, except I see there are four!
Them: Well can you give us the apartment at the same price as the studio, since we forgot to mention our other son.
Me: No sorry for one the apartment is booked, and secondly it would cost you an extra $60.
Them: Okay, (sighing) we will be forced to take the studio, even though you should have put us for no extra charge in the apartment.
Me: (Trying hard to ignore them) okay let’s get you checked in.
So I took them up to the room, showed them how to fold out the sofa, put in extra blanket as requested, (as they were from a warmer climate and it is so cold here).
Sit down to resume dinner, the phone rings.
Them: This is room 21 there is no remote for the TV.
Me: Okay I will come up.
I enter the room and the TV is playing, the 3 year old is watching TV with the remote in her hand.
Me: Your daughter has the remote.
Them: Don’t be silly...Oh did you just give it to her?
Me: No, (smiling condescendingly because by this time I had their number sussed).
Them: Ok we will call you if we have any other problems.
Me: Oh I’m sure you will be fine, really!
Sit down with fork in hand, phone rings.
Me: hello room 21.
Them: yes the doors in the toilet do not shut.
Me: Oh, I will come up.
In the hall way I noticed a pungent smell coming from under the door of room 21, upon opening the door, I notice the microwave has smoke pouring out of it. I look around the room, they are all watching TV, (with the found remote).
Me: Did you noticed the microwave, I say as they look at me. By this time I have the remainder of microwave popcorn smoldering and burning on the tray, and place it out the door.
Them: What is wrong with this product, it says microwave for up to 5 minutes.
Me: or until it stops popping, most occasions in under 3 minutes.
Them, Silly microwave, you should have it looked at.
Me, examining the Microwave: Ah I think you have burnt the wall of the oven, (and stunk out the room and upper floor).
Them: Never mind, you should fix these broken doors, (these are sliding doors that open the bath tub into the room, most people know how to work sliding doors).
Me: Okay just pull them together like this (demonstrating sliding doors).
Them: oh the silly things didn’t work before.
Me: Funny that...
So sitting down to cold dinner phone rings.
Me: Hi room 21.
Them: How do we get an outside line to call a pizza place.
Me: on the phone handset there is a sticker that says push one for outside line.
Them: Oh how can I see that when I pick up the phone?
Me: You are dead right, I never thought about not putting a sticker on the phone.
Them: And by the way, there is an issue with the pull out bed.
Me: Would you like me to come and put it together?
Them: It might be hard because it is broken.
Me: How?
Them: Not sure my husband thinks it was broken before we got here.
Me: I will come up.
I come up the stairs to hear their door slam, and the sound of broken plastic, the microwave which is placed beside the door, has its door jammed in the door way, (sorry I know that sounds confusing, but with over 20k guests we have never had the microwave busted).
Them: oh the silly things didn’t work before.
Me: Funny that...
So sitting down to cold dinner phone rings.
Me: Hi room 21.
Them: How do we get an outside line to call a pizza place.
Me: on the phone handset there is a sticker that says push one for outside line.
Them: Oh how can I see that when I pick up the phone?
Me: You are dead right, I never thought about not putting a sticker on the phone.
Them: And by the way, there is an issue with the pull out bed.
Me: Would you like me to come and put it together?
Them: It might be hard because it is broken.
Me: How?
Them: Not sure my husband thinks it was broken before we got here.
Me: I will come up.
I come up the stairs to hear their door slam, and the sound of broken plastic, the microwave which is placed beside the door, has its door jammed in the door way, (sorry I know that sounds confusing, but with over 20k guests we have never had the microwave busted).
I enter and Mrs. Them is standing holding the microwave door shut, Mr. Them is staring at a broken bar in his hand from the pull out sofa.
Me: What seems to be the problem?
Them: When I tried to pull out the bed this bar fell on the ground.
Me: Mmm did you lift the lever like I showed you before?
Them: There was no lever, and I think you must of damaged it when you showed me.
Me: Okay we will sort this out later; I fixed up the bed, and wedge the broken bar back into place.
Me: Okay anything else?
Them: I want to tell you we are Doctors and are very intelligent people, never have we had so much trouble as we have encountered staying here.
Me: Good night.
20 Minutes later the phone rings.
Them: how do was shut these sliding door properly?
Me, I will come up and wedge them shut.
Them: Okay.
Enter the room the Microwave is sitting on the bench, the door squ-wiff (ignore the door).
Me: What is the problem with the doors?
Me: What seems to be the problem?
Them: When I tried to pull out the bed this bar fell on the ground.
Me: Mmm did you lift the lever like I showed you before?
Them: There was no lever, and I think you must of damaged it when you showed me.
Me: Okay we will sort this out later; I fixed up the bed, and wedge the broken bar back into place.
Me: Okay anything else?
Them: I want to tell you we are Doctors and are very intelligent people, never have we had so much trouble as we have encountered staying here.
Me: Good night.
20 Minutes later the phone rings.
Them: how do was shut these sliding door properly?
Me, I will come up and wedge them shut.
Them: Okay.
Enter the room the Microwave is sitting on the bench, the door squ-wiff (ignore the door).
Me: What is the problem with the doors?
Them: these doors are terrible, the will not shut at all, our daughter can see me through the gap,.
Me: what gap?
Them: This gap, showing a door that is now off the rails: I fix the doors and leave.
30 minutes later the phone rings, it is now about 9.30 pm.
Them: We want to use the laundry to wash our clothes.
Me: Sorry the laundry is closed, because we don’t want to wake up the other guests.
Them: Don’t be silly, we will be quiet.
Me: The laundry is closed, you can get up early in the morning and use it before 8am.
The next day they checked out early, settled their account. I went up to the room, it was totally trashed, the microwave was stuffed, there was rubbish all over the floor, human waste from the young boy left by the rubbish bin.
What proceeded next was a battle as I used their credit card to pay for new microwave, and extra cleaning costs.
I don't think that I have ever had such annoying guests, I know that this is long, but believe me it is the shortened version!
Me: what gap?
Them: This gap, showing a door that is now off the rails: I fix the doors and leave.
30 minutes later the phone rings, it is now about 9.30 pm.
Them: We want to use the laundry to wash our clothes.
Me: Sorry the laundry is closed, because we don’t want to wake up the other guests.
Them: Don’t be silly, we will be quiet.
Me: The laundry is closed, you can get up early in the morning and use it before 8am.
The next day they checked out early, settled their account. I went up to the room, it was totally trashed, the microwave was stuffed, there was rubbish all over the floor, human waste from the young boy left by the rubbish bin.
What proceeded next was a battle as I used their credit card to pay for new microwave, and extra cleaning costs.
I don't think that I have ever had such annoying guests, I know that this is long, but believe me it is the shortened version!
