Saturday, August 20, 2011

Situation Vacant - Motel Wife

Mrs Motella after nearly 18 years of institutionalisation in the dynamic world of the motel industry has decided to venture out by securing a full-time job. Why anyone would want to throw away a position of continually working alongside me in a business for 24 hours a day is beyond belief!

This means there is now an amazing opportunity for a budding young person to take-on the vacated position of "Motel Wife" during Mrs Motella's absences on weekdays during normal working hours.

Due to the Human Rights Act I'm unable to stipulate my preferred gender for the position - however I will probably only interview female applicants.

I have completed a brief job description  for a "Motel Wife" that is appended below:
 All day-to-day activities of running a motel.
The successful applicant must be easy on the eye, willing to work hard, continually multi-task and problem-solve. Experience in customer relations, plumbing and carpentry would also be an advantage. 

I will of course continue in my supporting role as "Motel Husband" that includes networking with my favourite guests, attending meetings, pontificating about the wider issues of the motel industry and attempting to decipher the meaning of life.

And don't worry - the successful applicant will not be expected to perform any interpersonal duties in the bedroom area with the "Motel Husband." Unfortunately, it is extremely rare for the position of  "Motel Wife" to have this impost included in her job description.

Don't let this one-in-a-lifetime opportunity pass you by - send your CV and a few current snapshots of yourself to motelwife@motelnz.co.nz.

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